Briefly, On Running and Grief - Makeup and Beauty Blog
Breathe in, breathe out.
One foot in front of the other.
These are the things I kept repeating to myself on the treadmill this forenoon.
Breathe. One foot. Continue going.
Everything'south been a little harder than usual since the other mean solar day…
Haven't really wanted to consume or exercise, although I tried to run today, and I've been sleeping like crap, as well.
I thought I'd braced myself mentally for what happened this calendar week, but I approximate non. I'm fine most of the time, but then a moving ridge of grief crashes over me; information technology comes in waves.
I'm okay when I'm focusing on something, similar trying to take pretty pictures or writing a web log. I think I'g the kind of person who buries herself in her piece of work when something bad happens… I approximate yous larn something new near yourself every mean solar day.
The minute I stop and permit my mind wander, my optics well up. I've been crying at random times, like while getting a drinking glass of h2o from the kitchen in the middle of the night, standing by the corn chips at Trader Joe'due south (that was awkward), sitting in my car yesterday after a pedicure. (Information technology was a good pedi, as well. For that one, fleeting hr I felt well-nigh similar myself once again.)
El Hub holds me and says, "Shauna is in puppy heaven at present, playing with all of the good dogs like Kolohe and Bell." Merely there's a hole in my heart.
Even with all of the mistakes I've made in my life, all of my faults, she loved me unconditionally, without judgement.
I made myself become for a run this morning even though I really didn't desire to. Every bit I settled into a rhythm, I started thinking about the times Shauna and I ran and played together, her grinning, and the last fourth dimension I looked into her eyes in the lawn, but the two of us, every bit the wind rustled the apple trees and the current of air chimes tinkled.
I stroked her cheeks and whispered to her over and over, "You lot're my good, sweet girl. I love you so much."
At some point on my run, the tears just mixed with the sweat until I couldn't tell them apart, and I thought to myself how lucky I was to love and be loved similar that.
Breathe. I foot. Keep going.
Your friendly neighborhood beauty addict,
Karen
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